Noah's Chocolate Cake

This is an adaptation of Texas Sheet Cake. My son and I gobbled it down so fast we didn't have time to take a picture of it.

Combine A:

1 c. flour
1 t. baking powder
1 t. cinnamon
1/2 t. salt

Combine B:

1/2 c. cocoa
1/2 c. boiling water

Combine C:

1 cup sugar
2 eggs
1/2 milk

Combine A, B, and C together. Pour into round pan and bake. I think my pan size is 8*8.

14 stray socks

one of lifes great mysteries

It's Snowing Paper Snowflakes

My son has an obsession with making paper snowflakes.
(This is the first post I am making from my cellphone.)

God Is a Robot

My son likes to ask questions--global warming, cigarettes, and God are his favorite topics.

Today he asked, "How does God eat?"

I said, "God doesn't eat."

He said, "Why?"

I said, "God doesn't need to eat."

He said, "Why?"

I said, "God isn't human."

He said, "Is God a robot?"

I said, "No."

He said, "I think God is a robot. Robots don't need to eat. God doesn't need to eat."

End of theological conversation.

Living With Depression and Anxiety

When I was in college, I had a bout of depression which I barely survived. It came on slowly and left even more slowly. Though the worst of it lasted only a few months, the entire awful experienced stretched over more than two years.

Since that time, I've been vigilent about not letting myself fall back into the dark abyss. Still, my struggles with depression come and go--albeit in a far less intense form than I experienced in college.

I do virtually everything which has ever been recommended to prevent or treat depression. I have lots of friends whom I meet regularly. I eat healthily, including plenty of fish and seafood. I exercise. I maintain my weight. I read the Bible, pray, and sing hymns. I don't abuse alcohol. I think positively. I express my negative feelings. I have enjoyable hobbies. I sleep enough.

In spite of all my efforts, I can't quite manage to totally banish depression from my life. It's like an old friend that keeps stopping by for a visit every so often. I've learned to endure, even ignore, the occasional visits, because I know they won't last long.

To make matters worse, I also suffer from recurrent bouts of anxiety. In some ways, the anxiety is far more difficult to bear than the depression. It is physically uncomfortable and distracting. I feel tightness in my chest. My heart beats faster, and my body feels generally "not right." The anxiety seems to originate in my chest and often refuses to leave for days, no matter what I try to do. Exercise is helpful, but (surprisingly) the most helpful thing is being busy doing some challenging activity. Going to work is quite helpful, even when I don't enjoy my job.

My mother also struggled with both depression and anxiety, as did her mother. My guess is that is it probably something genetic. I'm just grateful that I've learned to live with it. My grandmother and mother both struggled with alcoholism. I think it was their way to try to deal with the anxiety. Fortunately, I've taken a different path.

옛사랑

남들도 모르게 서성이다 울었지 지나온 일들이 가슴에 사무쳐
텅 빈 하늘밑 불빛들 켜져 가면 옛사랑 그 이름 아껴 불러보네

찬바람 불어와 옷깃을 여미우다 후회가 또 화가 난 눈물이 흐르네
누가 물어도 아플 것 같지 않던 지나온 내 모습 모두 거짓인걸

이제 그리운 것은 그리운 대로 내 맘에 둘 꺼야
그대 생각이 나면 생각 난 대로 내버려 두 듯이

흰눈 나리면 들판에 서성이다 옛사랑 생각에 그 길 찾아가지
광화문 거리 흰눈에 덮여가고 하얀 눈 하늘 높이 자꾸 올라가네

사랑이란 게 지겨울 때가 있지 내 맘에 고독이 너무 흘러 넘쳐
눈 녹은 봄날 푸르른 잎새 위엔 옛사랑 그대모습 영원 속에 있네

South Korea: Where Cows Fear the Needle

Ever talked to someone who takes blood from cows for a living? I have.

Last year, I taught a English class to newly hired Incheon civil servants. Among them was a cool guy named "Iron" (정철). He majored in veterinary medicine and his job consists of traveling to farms all over the city, drawing blood from cows, and then taking the blood samples to a lab and having them tested for various diseases.

On Saturday, he got married. His wedding was held in a city (광주) about 4 hours drive away, so he chartered a bus to transport his coworkers and others who wanted to attend. Never one to turn down an opportunity to eat, I hopped on the bus.

If you've never traveled on a private bus in Korea, you've never lived. Though we departed around 7:30 AM, the alcohol was flowing before 8 AM (yes, sir, Koreans know how to party) and the tongues around me were magically loosened.

Almost all the people inside the bus were veterinarians employed by the government. I hit it off with one guy, whom I have nickednamed "Akina" (아끼나). Like my friend "Iron," he spends a lot of quality time with bovines. His line of work is not suitable for the fainthearted. Cows don't appreciate being poked with needles. Akina had to be taken to the emergency room one time when an angry cow smashed him against the side of a stall.

I asked him which part of the cows body is most suitable for extracting blood from. He said the portion right under the tail. I had no idea.

I asked him about the size of the farms. He said that the largest ones would have about 70-80 head of cattle, while the smallest ones would have one cow.

So then I asked, "Does the local government test every cow for disease or just a sampling of cows?" He informed me that Korean farmers do not give their cows antibiotics, so the government tests every single cow for disease. All. Of. Them.

Folks, I'm seriously impressed. South Korea has got its act together. It's true that there are no large farms here, and thus the production cost for all kinds if meat is quite high. Meat prices here are extremely high, some say the highest in the world. IMHO, that's a good thing both for public health and for the environment.

In comparison, I'm frightened by the state of the meat industry in the US. It just happens that the very weekend which I spent talking to Akina, my favorite journalist Nicholas Kristof wrote two sobering pieces about an outbreak of MRSA (methicillin-resistant Staphylococcus aureus) among pigs in Indiana.

Read it over your morning bacon and see if you feel the need to take some Pepto Bismal afterwards. The US, with its gigantic farms and unrestrained antibiotic usage, is ripe for this kind of outbreak. I'm worried.